I'm so fucking centered right now
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
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