She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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