He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
where are you?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.