Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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