I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
