And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Randomize
