so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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