I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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