I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Randomize
