can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
