I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
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