I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize