kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
