I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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