If you die in college, do you die in real life?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize