people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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