the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I don't think brook has ever known best
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
