You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Randomize
