I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
Acid is not a monday night drug
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Randomize
