I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
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