okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
