Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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