Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
