I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
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I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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