Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
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