super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
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