I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
pop tarts are not kleenex
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
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