Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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