hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
