I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
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