i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
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