He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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