Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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