well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
