I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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