Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
