It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
