just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
