Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
