Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
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