So drunk its hurt
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Randomize
