Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
