I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
