I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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