I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
