He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Let's paint friendship bongs
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
