I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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