i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
