I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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