I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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