It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
